MISTRESS

I met him; I fell in love with him

I knew he wasn’t mines

But he grew on me

Like a 19^th century bottle of

Old money kind’a wine

She knew about us for years

And for years she took a back seat

Because she knew without me

His heart was strangely weak

He was a police officer

And in the line of duty, he was shot

I screamed!

Please tell me he is not dead!

Please tell me he is not!!

He laid in the hospital

In that dreadful coma for 20 long weeks

It was not her body he longed for

Between those hospital sheets

It was hard for her to deny

Because she knew if she did not find me

Her husband would surely die

This woman knew he was in love with me

And only wanted her husband to survive

So willing to do anything

To keep her husband alive

She grabbed his phone

Braced herself

And stood up on her feet

She sought me out knowing

His heart was strangely weak

I laid with him

And she approved of me

In that hospital bed

She silently requested help

And pushed me towards his bed

A few days later he awoke

I jumped up from between the sheets 

And it killed her

As she looked on

Knowing

I was the reason

His heart still beat

Its been three years now

And she is still his wife 

And  everyday

I regret the day

I saved that bastard’s life!

Voice – Poe-Estory Warning: Very sad poem

https://soundcloud.com/mentalnotes-1/voice

 

His name was Tommy and his spirit’s alive and well

I hope you don’t mind it’s his story I shall tell

He would be 37 but at the time he was 12

And for many years his life was a living hell.

It’s his father he despised

All his sneaky ways and dirty little lies

His dad was strange in many different ways

What Tommy didn’t know is his dad had full blown AIDS

His dad was in denial; he wouldn’t take any meds

Every night Tommy’s dad would cry then come lay in Tommy’s bed

Tommy was 12, to him a man, he knew this wasn’t right

He’d lay there quiet, he dare not fight

He was 15 and with every fiber he said NO!

His dad looked at him and they both stood toe to toe

Tommy stood strong as his dad raised his fist

This was his life and wasn’t it supposed to be a gift

Life’s meaning erased

And even his favorite pie had a bitter taste

He started feeling strange but he didn’t want to believe  

His dad had given him this horrible disease called HIV

Tommy’s life at this point, he felt like he had no say

Because the thoughts and feelings he was having surely made him gay

His father died and he was glad to see him go

He was a constant reminder of this disease and no one else could know

This thing had him tossing and turning all through the night

He was tired and said, Toya, I just don’t have the strength to fight

Tommy let the years pass him by with each passing day

The truth was he was scared and let fear lead the way

He was like a shadow chasing the sun until it disappeared

Tommy was lost and bound to a zillion little tears

Strangely his first semester class did a project on children with AIDS

And he decided to take his life back on that very special day

As he walked through the hospital children marked by sores

Babies in small bubbles; his heart was completely torn

He ran to the bathroom and cried until he hit the floor

He asked God; please tell me what is all this for

I don’t do drugs

I don’t sleep around

And Tommy didn’t want to be gay

His dad was just a real sick man that took his innocence away

For all the children who don’t have a choice

Tommy decided to take a stand and be the children’s voice

He stood in front of thousands and said

My name is Tommy and I have AIDS

And I’m speaking for all the little people who become victims every day

His body’s 6 feet under but his spirit is still alive

And if you’re reading this then his spirit has survived

This is Tommy’s way of continuing to be the children’s voice

This is for all the little people who never had a choice

 

 

                                                Thank you Tommy

Invictus By William Ernest Henley (Featured Poet)

Out of the night that covers me, 
Black as the Pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.

In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeoning’s of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.

Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the Horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds, and shall find, me unafraid.

It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll.
I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul.

Lost Girls – Poe-Estory – Audio

I’ve decided to write

Tonight’s not like any other night

Everything feels right, nothing’s wrong

I haven’t felt this way in so long

I’m at peace, all the chaos has finally ceased

There’s so much to be grateful for

God is opening so many doors

Have you ever looked at the stars 

And wondered if there’s life force on mars

And if their struggles are the same as ours

My mind is not somewhere far away

The only thing I worry about is what to cook today

I’m not on the streets walking the beat

Panhandling just to get a bite to eat

Some angel sent down to lend a hand

In the form of some perverted man

And when I do get the money it’s like bee’s on honey

YUP!

Dope boyz ridin’ with that look like

WASSUP!

So I do what I do, and I run like a little girl late for school.

They see desperation in my eyes

They ask me

Do you need this?

And of course I lie

They’re tigers looking for meat

So I get high and I’m back on the streets, with nowhere to go

I know some old man’s looking for a show

It’s lonely out here

Damn, no one knows

I look and see girls just as lonely as me, wishing to pray or praying to wish to be free

But drugs were all we were able to see

And I know deep down inside this isn’t really me

I knew this man he took my girl for a ride

I told her not to go she said she wouldn’t but she lied

She thought I was try’na steal her trick

It’s funny how a junkies mind ticks

The core of this disease had me constantly on my knees and it wasn’t to pray

ANYWAY

There were many days I had to swallow my pride

I was seriously contemplating suicide

I just wanted to kill myself and die

I was a hopeless bum ten times over and then some

Why did my friend have to go for that ride

I got this really strange feeling inside

I kept seeing visions of her being swept up on a tide

I kept getting these visions over and over again

She’s probably high, real hard to defend

It was during my worst days that I prayed

I was walking through life’s crazy maze, and in an alley way there my friend laid

This was bad news I was lost and completely confused and was living in a world of self-centered fools!

I’ve been asking God to send me a sign

Leave this place, right now’s the time

This is where I’m at this moment is mine

Should I stay or should I go?

Please someone help me ‘cause I don’t know

All I know is where I’ve been, near death experiences and 100% sin

I’ll never forget how I let this disease win

When I think of the fire I’ve survived

I often wonder why I’m still alive

God has this major plan and I’m so excited cause I haven’t ran

My friend got killed by some crazy man

But I believe she was part of God’s perfect plan

Some have to die for others to live and for that reason I promise to give all of me to recovery

I have one chance to make this right

And for that reason I promise to always walk in Gods eye sight

Wanna walk in my shoes

I don’t think so

These are places no one should ever go