!INSOMNIA!

https://soundcloud.com/mentalnotes-1/INSOMNIA -poetry

Finger tips and microchips dissect my random thoughts

While movies play obsessively of all that daddy taught

I’m here once a week tryn’a get the bugs out my head

But the only thing this quack does is prescribe another fuckin’ med

Bugaboos and daja vu’s taunt my twisted brain

Perplexing me and vexing me

Take me out these fuckin chains

I shift my body loosely tryn’a pull back on the reins

But these voices keep whispering to me

Saying

VOICES: You know you’re fuckin’ insane

Clouds of shame

Socially stained

Fully engulfed in this cryptic game

I can’t escape these awful memories

So  I try and write away the pain 

I lay there blamelessly

As he dissects my twisted mind

ME: Yea I know

As he looks ahead and says

DOCTOR: Were out of fucking time

Finger tips and microchips dissect my twisted thoughts

While tapes play obsessively of all that daddy taught

Finger tips and microchips dissect my twisted thoughts

While tapes play obsessively of all that daddy taught

Finger tips and microchips dissect my twisted thoughts

While tapes play obsessively of all that daddy taught

Finger tips and microchips dissect my twisted thoughts

While tapes play obsessively of all that daddy taught

Finger tips and microchips dissect my twisted thoughts

While tapes play obsessively of all that daddy taught

Finger tips and microchips dissect my twisted thoughts

While tapes play obsessively of all that daddy taught

Finger tips and microchips dissect my twisted thoughts

While tapes play obsessively of all that daddy taught

Finger tips and microchips dissect my twisted thoughts

While tapes play obsessively of all that daddy taught

While tapes play obsessively of all that daddy taught

While tapes play obsessively of all that daddy taught

While tapes play obsessively of all that daddy taught

While tapes play obsessively of all that daddy taught

While tapes play obsessively of all that daddy taught

While tapes play obsessively of all that daddy taught

While tapes play obsessively of all that daddy taught

ME: Yea I know

DOCTOR: Were out of fucking time

Invictus By William Ernest Henley (Featured Poet)

I am the captain of my soul ❤

https://soundcloud.com/mentalnotes-1/invictus-by-william-ernest?si=b326e984a4d34d79ba2656b4f795bf37&utm_source=clipboard&utm_medium=text&utm_campaign=social_sharing

mentalnotes1

Out of the night that covers me, 
Black as the Pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.

In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeoning’s of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.

Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the Horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds, and shall find, me unafraid.

It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll.
I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul.

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Winter stayed and every beat in my heart was hollowed and delayed ❤

mentalnotes1

Fire stones rip through my daydreams

Strong holds

Schemes and tactics

Screams

My name

And life never seemed the same

Winter brought pain froze still up against this game

It was an evil twist

Loving you beyond the bliss was a wicked kiss

That blamed him, her and daddy

For all of this

My heart missed every season

I thought it was you that gave life meaning and reason

But winter stayed

And each beat in my heart was hollow and delayed

Bottomless floors

And empty doors

Were prolonged

For way too long

Until winter

And snow flakes

Froze still

Upon my lips

Where a thousand rips

That brought lessons

To this season

 

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Randomly posting old pieces ❤

 

mentalnotes1

The seclusion

The confusion

Tryna’ lose them

THE THOUGHTS

Pray for me

Stay with me

Just lay with me

Stay away from me

INSANITY!

The pain I can’t keep you from

No matter how hard I try

My spirit won’t let me run

From

THE PAIN!

The contusions

Cant move them

Didn’t choose them

Can’t sooth them

That’s why

Time is an Illusion

The minutes

Hours

Days

They won’t let me forget

That it’s the thoughts

In your head

I try and resist

Yes

YOUR THOUGHTS

I’m not psychic

But sometimes I feel you and it’s heavy

And can’t no levee tame your tidal wave of emotion

AND I AINT TALKIN’ BOUT LOVE…

If I knew what you knew

I’d tell time it was a lie

But the truth can’t be ignored

No matter how hard I try

EVIDENCE!

I can’t put expectations on TIME

Because it will always let me down

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Come sail away with me, another refurbished piece. Enjoy ❤

mentalnotes1

He made me feel like I was in dream

With a lot of gentle

Mixed with a just enough mean

He touched me softly

And my nibbles arose

He even asked me if he could suck my toes

He was nothing like the last man  I choose

He sucked on my nibbles

Like cherries to the seed

I was hungry for this ocean in me to be freed

I rolled over, trying to shift my weight

I wasn’t sure if I was dreaming

It felt like I was in some kind of dream state

He kissed my neck

And he made me moan

He looked in my eyes

Challenging my sensual tone

I tried to get up but he pinned me down

And all I heard was nasty, wet slurping sounds

He had me wet and paralyzed to the bed

His face disappeared and all I saw was his head

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Haiku Untitled

Seasonal you are

Only the breath I breathe in

Capture and release

MISTRESS (W/AUDIO) – 2012

mentalnotes1

https://soundcloud.com/mentalnotes-1/mistress-1

I met him; I fell in love with him

I knew he wasn’t mine

But he grew on me

Like a 19^th century bottle of

Old money kind’a wine

She knew about us for years

And for years she took a back seat

Because she knew without me

His heart was strangely weak

He was a police officer

And in the line of duty, he was shot

I screamed!

Please tell me he is not dead!

Please tell me he is not!!

He laid in the hospital

In that dreadful coma for 20 long weeks

It was not her body he longed for

Between those hospital sheets

It was hard for her to deny

Because she knew if she did not find me

Her husband would surely die

This woman knew he was in love with me

And only wanted her husband to survive

So willing to do anything

To…

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Widowed – Poetry

My ring finger holds a secret

A lingering

To be remembered

Opposite side

It sits heavy

Where two worlds collide

My right hand is covered

But my ring finger died

There is no growing season

Twilight moons have become full grown

The growl in my aches have turned full blown

I am childlike from these moans

My pen and paper have turned stones

From the weight of this wind

And death has become my companion

Widowed

***
https://www.eterneva.com/resources/what-to-do-with-wedding-ring-after-spouse-dies

The Language of Love – Poetry

I lay and I think

Love can happen in one simple wink

And has many times before

Love is something we’ve all explored

Chances we take

That either makes or break our opinion of love

Fields of emotions

Like a rose that we chose

A risk we take, it’s a big deal because it’s our hearts that’s at stake

Love is like a fire, an arsenal of desire, a whirlpool of devotion, and weird subliminal notions

Bottled up it’s the heart’s magical potion

Love can be good; love can be bad, love can be happy, love can be sad

It’s all up to you

Just as cool as the wind or as painful as a pin poking at your gut

We’re so easily caught up in love’s clutch

Or as beautiful as the symphony or diamonds from Tiffany’s

Love can be sweet as candy or… fine and dandy

Or as spectacular as fire works with quarks and perks

Depends on me and how far my love is willing to see

My love sees rainbows and daffodils like a roller coaster with thrills and exciting twists

Or that first passionate kiss

Have you ever listened and heard like a baby’s first word

It rained yesterday and guess what I saw?

I saw tear drops constantly fall

I love the sound of rain

Love should not mean pain

I used to think love could meet me on the moon and never would be too soon

We should nurture love and give it every chance we can

I choose to vent love through my pen and hope this time love will win

Love has been a symphony of dreams and I’ve always been on the losing team

Love can be a fire hard to tame

Or fall in love and not even know their name

Love has no faces and doesn’t discriminate between races

Love can be paint on a canvas

Splashes of love

Overwhelming hugs

That runs through my veins like drugs

Love is lily’s and quiet little walks in South Philly or silly little looks

That’s the language of love

When I think of love I think of hearts being colored in red or children being told stories before they go to bed

When I think of love I think of pastures filled with butterflies or teachers teaching children how to make tie-dye

When I think of love I think of how excited my grandma was when she brought my first bra

When I think of love I think of leaves changing colors in the fall and couples holding hands while shopping in the mall

When I think of love I think of angels being sent down to lend a hand or birds playing footsies in the sand

Love will be here when we’re dead and gone love has been here all along

Love is something money can’t buy

Love has many questions…

But no answers

So don’t ask love… why ?

Use the universe as your source

Allowing love to take its course

100 YEARS – Poetry

100 years to exist here,
Chasing eternity
Nothing is as it appears
Frightened tears leap from my face
Time is not steady moving at its own pace
The clock at war with fate
It’s a deceptive chase
My cat has 9 lives but fights to stay alive past 8 teen

Or somewhere in between
And I wish
I wished
I wished the whys

We’re all going to die
Why are we tied to this troubled lie called purpose and destiny
100 years left the rest of me
And I wish
And I wished
For my cat to have
100 years