LOST

IT’S CRAZY IN HERE! (POETRY W/AUDIO)

I am wondering in this valley

With a shadow

Called death

Desperately trying every trick

To inhale my last breath

As the shadow kneels

It does everything in its power

To make me feel

What is not real

Peel me of my iniquities

My infidelities

This shadow plays mind games with me

It’s crazy in here!

And i can hear the sounds

That tries to keep me bound

To thine own self be true

I’m running from my shadow

Like that scary clown from school

I am screaming out for help

I am doomed to the top shelf

Like a broken piece of china

Labeled

Afflicted!

Addicted!

It’s the wicked things I tell myself

Whew!

It’s crazy in here!

And that thing

That silly thing

That god awful thing

Called fear

Keeps echoing between my ears

And all I can hear

Is

It’s crazy in here!

Here

Here

Here

Echoing

It’s crazy in here!

Here

Here

Here

JILTED CEMENT (POETRY)

FYI:  https://mentalnotes1.wordpress.com/2013/05/23/tears-poem/

I call her sad and troubled, she is beautiful and her face has inspired many pieces.

So here she is again (:

 Tears weighing heavy

 Was the crooked tilt of judgments scales

I could feel the rust that sired me in between my harnessed vial

I wanted love but hate was the only boat that sailed

Rotted flint

Air came

Then went

Teasing sensations

That leaned

Then bend

Cement

That became

Part of me

Sunk Deep were fragments of

What I used to be

What I used to be

What I used to be

What I used to be

What I used to be

What I used to be

What I used to be

What I used to be

Sunk Deep were fragments of

What I used to be

What I used to be

What I used to be

What I used to be

Rotted flint

Air came

Then went

RESIDUE (POETRY)

This is a drawling

Not to be confused with a real life event

I watched my chest

Only flesh between the earth and my breast

That heaved monumental particles of me

Fragmented remnants

Debris

Left behind

Shattered glass

Little pieces of me

I needed his bricks to build me strong

Nestled in his flesh is where I belonged

And so I wait

For

A steady heave

To blow deep in my chest

SOMETHING BEAUTIFUL (POETRY W/ AUDIO)

https://soundcloud.com/mentalnotes-1/something-beautiful-poetry

My shadow keeps chasing me

Urging me to create

Something Beautiful

An epiphany stiffens me into a dark thought

As I begin to create a Beautiful dialogue

With self

I embrace Serpendipity

And I realize

She was

Something Beautiful

OK, SO I HAVE NOT PERFECTED THIS “SOMETHING BEAUTIFUL” CONCEPT YET. THIS POEM STILL HAS DARK UNDERTONES, EVIDENCE BY THE PICTURE I AM STILL A LITTLE BITTER. 

IT’S PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION PEOPLE (:

THE HEART IS RESILIENT

INSOMNIA (POETRY W/ AUDIO)

https://soundcloud.com/mentalnotes-1/INSOMNIA -poetry

Finger tips and microchips dissect my random thoughts

While movies play obsessively of all that daddy taught

I’m here once a week tryn’a get the bugs out my head

But the only thing this quack does is prescribe another fuckin med

Bugaboos and daja vu’s taunt my twisted brain

Perplexing me and vexing me

Take me out these fuckin chains

I shift my body loosely tryn’a pull back on the reins

But these voices keep whispering to me

Saying

VOICES: You know you’re fucking insane

Clouds of shame

Socially stained

Fully engulfed in this cryptic game

I can’t escape these aweful memories

So  I try and write away the pain 

I lay there blamelessly

As he dissects my twisted mind

ME: Yea I know

As he looks ahead and says

DOCTOR: Were out of fucking time

Finger tips and microchips dissect my twisted thoughts

While tapes play obsessively of all that daddy taught

Finger tips and microchips dissect my twisted thoughts

While tapes play obsessively of all that daddy taught

Finger tips and microchips dissect my twisted thoughts

While tapes play obsessively of all that daddy taught

Finger tips and microchips dissect my twisted thoughts

While tapes play obsessively of all that daddy taught

Finger tips and microchips dissect my twisted thoughts

While tapes play obsessively of all that daddy taught

Finger tips and microchips dissect my twisted thoughts

While tapes play obsessively of all that daddy taught

Finger tips and microchips dissect my twisted thoughts

While tapes play obsessively of all that daddy taught

Finger tips and microchips dissect my twisted thoughts

While tapes play obsessively of all that daddy taught

While tapes play obsessively of all that daddy taught

While tapes play obsessively of all that daddy taught

While tapes play obsessively of all that daddy taught

While tapes play obsessively of all that daddy taught

While tapes play obsessively of all that daddy taught

While tapes play obsessively of all that daddy taught

While tapes play obsessively of all that daddy taught

ME: Yea I know

DOCTOR: Were out of fucking time

PROZAC (POETRY)

 

I’m lost, and I’m trying to find my way back.

Where am I?

Who are you?

I’m schizo and you look schizo too.

How do I get out of this fucking box?

I’m walking but I can’t feel my feet.

I’m being pushed by a fiery heat.

OUCH!!!

That hurts.

STOP!!!

Where the fuck am I?

It’s dark.

I can’t see.

WILL SOMEONE TURN ON THE FUCKING LIGHTS!!!

Wait! Wait!

This can’t be right.

Something’s wrong.

Where are the damn lights?

It’s dark.

Shit, I’m scared.

This is weird.

Damn, it’s HOT.

WILL SOMEONE TURN THE DAMN HEAT OFF!!!

PLEASE, PLEASE….

Ok, ok let me calm down and figure out how the hell I got here so I can get the hell out.

Ok, think.

The last thing I remember.

What was the last thing I remember?

Oh, I was with that guy and he was so, so fine.

Shit, I’m drawing a blank.

My eyes are getting heavy.

I. Just. Want. To.Go. To. Sleep.

BITCH WAKE UP!!!

BITCH WAKE UP!!!

WHERE WAS I?

Oh, oh ok I remember.

The bathroom.

I was in the bathroom.

That man was with me.

I can’t keep my eyes open.

OPEN YOU’RE FUCKIN EYES.

Come on open, open…

It feels like I’m watching a movie.

This shit is crazy.

I have got to pull myself together.

It’s the PROZAC.

Yeah.

The fucking PROZAC…

FUCKIN WITH MY HEAD!

I need to get off these drugs.

HEY!!!

HEY YOU OVER THERE!!!

Where the fuck are we?

Hey, where you going?

You can’t just leave me here.

Shit I. AM. FADING.

It feels so good.

Oh please let me fade.

It feels too good to come back now.

GRAB MY HAND!!!

COME ON GRAB MY HAND!!!

I have got to leave those fucking drugs alone.

Mental note…

Need a bigger bathroom.

Thank you, Insanity.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

PROZAC

I’m lost, and I’m trying to find my way back.

Where am I?

Who are you?

I’m schizo and you look schizo too.

How do I get out of this fucking box?

I’m walking but I can’t feel my feet.

I’m being pushed by a fiery heat.

OUCH!!!

That hurts.

STOP!!!

Where the fuck am I?

It’s dark.

I can’t see.

WILL SOMEONE TURN ON THE FUCKING LIGHTS!!!

Wait! Wait!

This can’t be right.

Something’s wrong.

Where are the damn lights?

It’s dark.

Shit, I’m scared.

This is weird.

Damn, it’s HOT.

WILL SOMEONE TURN THE DAMN HEAT OFF!!!

PLEASE, PLEASE….

Ok, ok let me calm down and figure out how the hell I got here so I can get the hell out.

Ok, think.

The last thing I remember.

What was the last thing I remember?

Oh, I was with that guy and he was so, so fine.

Shit, I’m drawing a blank.

My eyes are getting heavy.

I. Just. Want. To.Go. To. Sleep.

BITCH WAKE UP!!!

BITCH WAKE UP!!!

WHERE WAS I?

Oh, oh ok I remember.

The bathroom.

I was in the bathroom.

That man was with me.

I can’t keep my eyes open.

OPEN YOU’RE FUCKIN EYES.

Come on open, open…

It feels like I’m watching a movie.

This shit is crazy.

I have got to pull myself together.

It’s the PROZAC.

Yeah.

The fucking PROZAC…

FUCKIN WITH MY HEAD!

I need to get off these drugs.

HEY!!!

HEY YOU OVER THERE!!!

Where the fuck are we?

Hey, where you going?

You can’t just leave me here.

Shit I. AM. FADING.

It feels so good.

Oh please let me fade.

It feels too good to come back now.

GRAB MY HAND!!!

COME ON GRAB MY HAND!!!

I have got to leave those fucking drugs alone.

Mental note…

Need a bigger bathroom.

Thank you, Insanity.