I have gone for miles trying to catch your breathe
Lost left me
Lay death upon my chest
Trying to catch the demon that rolls rust
Timely
Unrest
And a phantoms tale swags
and it drags
and it drags
my face sags
And it sags and I’m sad
Because death waits for me
When after a week
He is grunting
Startled at the suck
Of my body
At the impossible of his luck
He won’t know
How easily we arrived here
Playing beats in the half light
Won’t know that I have washed these sheets today
And I will again tonight
Won’t know that I ruin love
With the melody of men
Slipping into the soft hunger of my dreamsWon’t know that I can make storms
And quiet themWith just a breath
When after a week
He is grunting
Startled at the suck
Of my body
At the impossible of his luck
He won’t know
How easily we arrived here
Playing beats in the half light
Won’t know that I have washed these sheets today
And I will again tonight
Won’t know that I ruin love
With the melody of men
Slipping into the soft hunger of my dreams
Won’t know that I can make storms
And quiet them
With just a breath
Time ~ Poem

An epiphany stiffens me
My thoughts
Until I remember
That I was loved
Case Study #1 ~ Therapy

Security did escort me out of my therapist office, well 4 of my previous therapist anyway but who’s counting
This was my 9th visit to doctor Hommer Crumb
Hommer Crumb
Hommer Crumb
Hommer Crumb
His name doesn’t scream come talk to me
For some reason I’m always paired with a man
They can’t be trusted around a big ass and titties
We talked about everything and nothing at all
I covered my breast really well, the eagle hoodie I wore to every visit was intentional
Frankly I was bored
Therapy doesn’t work for me
I’m convinced my brain is broken and doctors have planted something sinister in my head when I had my tonsils removed when I was 11
Yea, I was 11, maybe 10
That’s when it happen
The thing
The something
It
The incident
Occurrence
The situation
Episode
It was an event
The dirty deed, landmark
The happening
The ugly
I just pretend it was a dream
Something ugly has happened again
Just my fuckin’ luck
I know its altered the thing the doctors planted in my brain when I got my tonsils removed when I was 10 or 11, I may have been 9
They put cha’ta’sleep ya know
4 or 5 maybe 6 doctors who I spate curse words at are convinced I need to talk about it
I mean…
If security wouldn’t have escorted me out the building this time again I may have gotten to it
But they never gave me a chance
I hate therapist
I don’t write sweet poems ~ Poetry

Chairs window pains and picture frames hold secrets
~~~
Misunderstood with tradition and verbs
~~~
Rifts creeks crevices and curves obey commands and surgically implant paranoia with bad words
~~~
I can see invisible people watching me hiding in the seams
~~~
While drums beat heavy from the rear of my twisted dreams
~~~
Naturally it’s the thing I wear
~~~
Everything is not always as beautiful as it may appear
~~~
I whisper truth to myself and pretend not to hear
~~~
Till poetry becomes aggressive and lines become smeared
~~~
Time has no expiration date and statute of limitations don’t exsist
~~~
Don’t ever get distracted it’s not always easy to resist
~~~
The thoughts
~~~
And I don’t write sweet poems
“Art hurts
Art urges voyages
– and it is easier to stay at home.”
“Be careful what you swallow
Chew!”
Casualties ~ Poetry

Darkness melted into my pain
One eye open to the sun
And my back to the moon
The earth whispers a calm
Graze memory
Casualties roam freely in wounded pastures
~~~
Seeds grow thick
And heavy
~~~
Till tears grew branches
And wrapped themselves
Into open wounds
And breathing
~~~
Became difficult
UPDATED 5/23/2023
It’s interesting the different response I got by changing the image and title. The words are the same but the image and title are different. It leads me to assume … This is a powerful image seen by many all over the world and holds a different meaning when read with the image. No one wanted to touch the comment section. Makes me curious??
What the fuck is this !?!? – Poetry 2012
http://soundcloud.com/mentalnotes-1/audio-recording-on-saturday
I didn’t mean to give myself to another
Or did I
He startled me as I turned around.
I heard that manly sound, that was him
I was caught off guard when he said
What the fuck is this!
I told my husband, it was only a kiss
I stood there in the rain as the gel from my curl set ran down my temple
I love you, I said, and again, he said
What the fuck is this!!
I, I, I, as I stuttered to try and find the words
My mistress stood there pleading with her eyes for me to acknowledge her
She wanted me to say, this is the woman I’ve been seeing every day
But I stood there
Blank
As I watched my husband’s heart sink into the earth with the rain
I wanted to reverse this pain
He said again with much more authority
View original post 57 more words
I found you – Poetry

One breeze
Bent me to one wind
And I found you
Little bird
Insanity – dVerse

I waited
While I live inside this twisted place
My fish died but I’m still alive
That is unquenchable
And breathing became difficult
Attitude
And green with envy
I’ve been left by the wayside
I smile and I curse
Made time against me
And turned me hungry
You catch me
All along was really ME
Such a painful death
Thru my heart
Where pain will be no more
Mourning was well on its way
You will stay with me and you’ll stay until the very end
Free me from this rag
It was only just a dream
***